Couldn't think of a better way to put across how i'm feeling right now,so borrowed the above..all this waiting for a discernible course or path to follow,this anticipation of a happily ever after,this wanting to slow down the last few months of college,this apprehension of leaving behind something valuable,this agitation at being at the epicentre of a volley of questions-answerable only by the tidings brought by time and fate...

Fate..naseeb..it's so inherently engraved in our Indian psyche..the standard answer to any failure-apne naseeb mein nahi hai,bhai..wonder why i started on this cynical line of thought..but it makes me cringe when i see people using it an excuse and on the other hand i wrap up my feelings deeming fate to be accountable for my future!!can it get any stranger??

PS: there are two kinds of people in the world-1.ones who've always known what they wanted to do with their life and 2.the others-the ones who are not really sure about it until much later ..technically,the first few are more rational and successful,but,boss,life in the latter group is more interesting-there is so much flexibility of options and exploitation of the same,culminating in richly varied experiences..lolz..giving a safaai for my inadequacy at this point of time.maybe.but i'll still stick to my notion-i'd rather be thick in the middle of this conundrum than lead a perfectly planned life..

pain..what is pain? i look upon it with new insight,every time i go through it...this time through,i define it as the terrible emotion which rips you apart when you realise that the ones you love are deeply unhappy and have been so for a long time,but you were too blind with your own stupid problems to see the truth behind the watery smiles...this agony is more profound than any i've been through..every wound that has been inflicted on my dear ones' souls leaves a scar on my own..the alternatives to combat the situation make it all the more helpless...you can still surf through life knowing tht your not happy,but you can't bear knowing that someone so dear to you is so miserable...my pain is not my own,but is more excruciating than mine could ever be..it is strange that the one going through it has more strength to face it than the one who watches it all from the sidelines..i'm broken,shattered..each step pricked with the shreds of someone else's broken dreams..

a short note on Magi or the Three Wise Men as they are widely called:

The Magi were the sacred caste of the Medes who provided as priests of Persia & had a dominating religious influence.The Gospel narrative omits to mention the number of the Magi & there is no certain tradition in this matter.Three Magi are heard of & their number in all probability is influenced by the number of gifts.Their names are Gaspar, Melchoir and Balthasar.It appears that they came from the East at the time of Christ's birth.Though what is meant by 'the East' is not specifically given,but it could refer to Babylonia or Persia.The visit of the Magi took place after the presentation of the child in the temple [Book of Luke,Bible].When Christ was born,there was throughout the Roman empire, general unrest and expectation of a golden age and a great deliverer. The Magi were probably led by these influences to look forward to a messiah who would come soon. But there must have been some special revelation by which they knew that the Star meant the birth of God and would lead them to the place of His birth.The Magi adored the child and offered him gold, frankinsence and myrhh.The giving of gifts was in keeping with the oriental customs. The purpose of gold is clear-material worth,but the purpose of the other gifts is not known. The Magi probably meant no symbolism,but critics have tried to find symbolic meaning in these three gifts. Frankinsence was supposes to forecast spiritualism,while myrhh represented martyrdom. The Cologne Cathedral contains what are claimed to be the Gifts of the Magi.These,it is said, were discovered in Persia and brought to Constantinople by St.Helena & tranferred to Cologne in 1163A.D.

It's always easier to come out of your shell when you are anonymous.No wonder.I don't have the courage to elaborate my initials while blogging.I am behind a curtain,yet very bare,very naked to the readers.You may wonder who am I,but you'll always know exactly who I am.If blogging is penning,ahem,typing your thoughts without deliberation,then yes,I'm here to blog.This is about me.moi.menga.Period.My private public space.
Oxymoronic,ain't it?